Choose your review!
That’s right folks, my fate rests in your hands. I haven’t been able to get to many film reviews lately due to my own skyrocketing film career. But now that I’ve told several A-List directors that my duties here are going to prevent them from signing me for their certain Oscar contenders I should have some time to get back to movies. So here’s the deal. I can probably only do one review a week, and I don’t want to try and predict which movies people are most interested in. I will be posting a list of the upcoming films for this week and a brief description. If you want to see a review for a particular film cast your vote by simply writing the title in a comment. Whichever movie gets the most votes is the one I will see.
Here are your choices for this week:
“Dan in Real Life”
Steve Carell (THE OFFICE, THE 40 YEAR OLD VIRGIN) stars as Dan, an advice columnist struggling to raise a house full of girls all by himself. But the real trouble begins when he falls for a beautiful woman (Juliette Binoche, CHOCOLAT) who turns out to be dating his brother (comedian Dane Cook).
My note: I won’t do this often, but please OH PLEASE give me the chance to review another Dane Cook movie.
”The Darjeeling Limited”
Wes Anderson, the creator of RUSHMORE and THE ROYAL TANNENBAUMS, offers another quirky, melancholic riff on familial ties and father issues in THE DARJEELING LIMITED. Francis (Owen Wilson) has invited his brothers, Jack (Jason Schwartzman) and Peter (Adrien Brody), to join him on a train trip for a spiritual quest through India. The brothers have been estranged since their father’s sudden death, and each is now embroiled in his own personal drama. Jack is being toyed with by his two-timing girlfriend, Peter’s wife is about to give birth, and Francis recently survived a car crash that nearly killed him. As the train chugs its way across India, the brothers try to reconnect, but mainly end up arguing BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH FUCKING BLAH.
Jesus, I can’t even print the whole synopsis here. Seriously, this is like a THIRD of it.
“Saw IV”
Jigsaw and his apprentice Amanda are dead.
Upon the news of Detective Kerry’s murder, two seasoned FBI profilers, Agent Strahm (Scott Patterson) and Agent Perez, arrive at the depleted police precinct and help veteran Detective Hoffman (Costas Mandylor) sift through Jigsaw’s latest grizzly game of victims and piece together the puzzle. However, when SWAT Commander Rigg, the last officer untouched by Jigsaw (Tobin Bell), is suddenly abducted and thrust into the madman’s harrowing game, the officer has but ninety minutes to overcome a series of interconnected traps…or face the deadly consequences.
Go ahead ya scurvy dogs ye, cast your votes and decide my fate.
