I have read and re-read the following about a dozen times, and still remain unable to completely wrap my head around it. Let’s see if you have any better luck.

According to The Hollywood Reporter:

“Grizzly Adams Prods. is doing a 3D remaster of “The Fabric of Life,” a docudrama that examines physical evidence of Jesus’ resurrection.”

Um, I beg your pardon? I don’t even know where to start in regards to what all about this concept just seems off to me. First of all, the fact that it would be a 3D version of a documentary.

While I don’t feel that showing documentaries in 3D is necessarily a bad idea–in fact, 3D documentaries could likely be an effective way of drawing attention to a frequently overlooked genre, and making documentaries that deal with intense subject matter even harder hitting–I’m just not sure audiences are ready for that yet.

More and more films are being released in 3D, and movie-goers seem to be eating them up. The thing to notice, however, is that most of the movies making 3D showings are animated. This is a far cry from a 3D take on a religious-oriented documentary.

Second, regardless of your personal religious beliefs (or lack thereof, if that’s the case), whether you believe the death and resurrection of Jesus actually happened or whether you see it as a nothing more than a fabricated story, the fact remains that it is an intricate part of a religious tradition. Turning the film 3D just seems like it would be putting the religiosity of it in a rather fantastical light.

And then there’s this. The release of the film is going to take place at the same time the Shroud of Turin is being publicly displayed for the first time in over a decade. Ok, that’s understandable, it’s a pretty good marketing ploy.

However:

“Using laser technology, a team of Dutch scientists was able to convert two-dimensional photographic negatives of the image on the shroud into an anatomically accurate hologram of the crucified man.”

Oh. No.

Yes folks, if you get the chance to see The Fabric of Life in 3D, you will have the privilege of seeing Jesus right in front of your face…and anatomically correct at that! I don’t know about you, but that’s a concept that’s slightly intimidating to me, and will probably translate as a bit overwhelming on the big screen.

It’s no secret that 3D is the trend in Hollywood these days, but frankly, some things just don’t need to take that route. The Fabric of Life just might be one of those things.